Do you recall a time when you were cowered by a bully? Did it make you feel like you wanted to slaughter him? There are strategic ways to fight a bully when negotiating. They start with how you plan your strategy for the negotiation and how you engage him.
Continue reading and you’ll discover how you can easily slaughter a bully in your negotiations.
The Setup: Bully’s Allies
- Know who the bully’s strongest and weakest allies are and know their strengths and weaknesses.
- Understand their sway with the bully and access how you might alter their allegiance to him and make them your ally.
- Devise a plan to have them fighting amongst themselves and think about at what point(s) in the negotiation that you might implement this scheme.
Cost: Price of Bullying
- Make it clear that they’ll be a toll to exact if the bully attempts to bully you during the negotiation.
- Consider how you might threaten the well-being of those the bully cares about (e.g. loss of finances, reputation, prestige, etc.) Be prepared to fire a warning shot to display your seriousness.
Strategies: Fighting Back
- Consider the demeanors you’ll display to exhibit your mannerisms during the negotiation. You should align your desires to move the bully to a place of comfort or discomfort, depending on the situation.
- Consider your strategies (e.g. pincer move (he’s surrounded with no way out), deceit (a bully will engage in deceit. To combat him, you must be willing to engage in it, too.)
Body Language: Interpreting Signals
- Gestures that indicate weakening (e.g. breaking eye contact (weakening), speaking verbosely (losing steam and/or attempting to dazzle you with his BS), hands closer to his body (protecting himself), Looking around at/for others (seeking assistance/help), requesting a recess (needs time to collect himself)
- Gestures that indicate strength (e.g. glaring (becoming more resolute), increasing the tone (attempting to convey commitment), asserting more space/puffing himself up (attempting to be perceived as bigger than he is), lack of veracity (he’s fearless about not being forthright – this might indicate desperation and/or an attempt to sway you by lying), insisting that you accept his position (act of intimidation)
- Keep in mind that any of the gestures above may be a ploy. To assess their validity, do the opposite of what’s displayed or match it; your actions will depend on the circumstances at hand. Either way, you’ll glean insight into the validity of is action by the way he responds to yours. Be aware of how the bully shifts his perspective and positioning in the negotiation based on your reply to his actions.
The Trail: Set Markers
- Be hypersensitive to the direction of the negotiation; know where you’re headed. If you don’t like where it’s going, change directions by invoking red herrings or any diversion you’ve created for this purpose.
- Have markers denoting exits from the negotiation when you sense you’re in futile
- Don’t stay engaged in a negotiation that’s not going expectedly if you see no way to make a course correction. You’ll hurt your negotiation position by doing so.
In your next negotiation, take heed of the points above. Assess how and when you’ll implement them. Adopt them as the shield and sword you use to combat a bully. In so doing, you’ll rob him of his powers… and everything will be right with the world.
Remember, you’re always negotiating!